with having four kids close together there are days that we go places and it is wonderful! today was one of those days. everyone is in a decent mood and they have a great time.
then there are days, like the other day at chickfila, where one or more of the children falls apart. they are crying, you feel like crying (from either embarassment or pure frustration). it amazes me the unpredictableness of these situations.
i began thinking about why this is the case then i realized a couple of things. first of all, i realized that they are little kids. profound i know but it is worth recognizing. i really should not be emotionally or mentally worn down because my 6,5,3, or 2 year old is not behaving. we need to be less emotional when dealing with our children whether in public or private. the second thing that i realized is that we have a high chance of having someone, including jonathan and myself, that is having an off day. not all six of us are going to sleep great, be free of illness or emotional stress. there is a high likelihood that one of the children are not going to be happy about something. one person, or several, may cry.
so what did my realizations help me out with? it helped me realize that the more i let someone’s bad mood roll off my shoulders the better. we need to deal with the behavior in a loving but non emotional way. i also have to adjust my expectations of good days and what fun means when we are all together. this is not a day where everyone is perfect. i, in my almost 28 years of life, have yet to be perfect in a day. my kids will not be either. if my emotional stability rests on how my kids are doing emotionally or behaviorally then there are going to be a lot of “bad” days.
and i have to face the fact that while it is hard now it is not nearly as hard as it was almost two years ago. the likelihood of all four crying at one time was higher then than it is now. i had three in diapers with one in pullups at night. i was either nursing or changing someone at any given time. they were 4, 2,15mos., and a newborn. i may not remember what it was like but things have greatly improved. 🙂
so i will enjoy them more and realize that i need to be less emotionally affected by their moods, including my big kid (jonathan). 🙂